Take a bath. While bathing, listen to shitty 80s glam, but make sure you keep the radio your iPhone more than an arm’s reach away from the tub.
Eat some fruits and vegetables. Nothing like some fructose and greens to help yank the wrench out of your otherwise shitty day.
Write an awful one-act play. Then read it aloud. Make sure to distinguish between characters by changing the timbre of your voice. If still sad: drink.
Get dressed up, and prepare a long & drawn-out meal for yourself with multiple courses. If you’re an awful cook, go out to eat (but make sure you’re overdressed for the occasion — this is important — you want to feel like best goddamn looking person in the room).
Shave your face, legs, or genitalia.
Go to the library and people-watch until you’ve discovered their tics/eccentricities.
Write a letter to someone you’ve been meaning…
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